Finding Balance After College
Recently, I’ve been evaluating the priorities in my life in an attempt to better balance everything adulthood throws at me. Leaving college and entering the “real world” had so many curveballs that I don’t think we talk about enough! It’s okay if finding balance takes some time, as well as trial and error!
I have three very general priorities in my life at the moment - my household, my relationships, and my job. The branch of my household contains keeping up with cooking, cleaning, giving my kitten the best possible life, paying rent & bills, and stocking the necessities. My relationships include my boyfriend, as well as my family and friends. My job is my job- working hard and continuing to learn and grow every day in my industry.
This is a lot!! Balance is hard!!
Some nights, I want to work late but that means I can’t see my boyfriend. Sometimes, I have dinner plans with my friends and can’t tidy my house. Other times, I need to clean my house but I can't step away from my desk because my work is too crazy. There is a constant triangle of priorities that need different amounts of attention at different times and that can be difficult to navigate ESPECIALLY right after college when life doesn’t seem too serious yet. I am also a relatively active person and I enjoy eating healthy, but finding time to take a 30-minute run and cook a well-rounded meal can be virtually impossible some days. Never mind trying to maintain a social life on top of it all.
I had a realization recently that I can only control so much. I would love to put my priorities in order and have them stay in that order, but that isn't life. Some weeks, one priority is going to force itself into the #1 seat, even though I intended to focus on something else. Sometimes my house is just going to have to stay messy for an extra day or two because I can’t get around to cleaning. Likewise, every now and then Mcdonalds will just have to do for dinner when I haven’t had the time to go to the grocery store. Certain nights I will force myself to shut my laptop at 5:30 and meet friends for dinner (despite having a million more things I could do before logging off), but other times will require me to stay plugged in and reschedule my dinner out with friends. Again, the priorities shift regularly and this requires a flexible mindset.
What I’ve realized is that balance, at this stage of my life, is not having set routines week to week. This would be virtually impossible and would result in a frenzied mind that was always trying to accommodate an unrealistic expectation of a perfectly scheduled life.
So for now, I’m doing what I can to stay on top of the things that matter to me; but, also giving myself grace in understanding that juggling all these things is hard at 23 and that's okay. If you’re doing the best you can, you're doing great! And yes, there will be days when I do not find the balance I’m looking for, when all three points of my priority triangle collide and create chaos; but again, I will have to give myself a break and be content knowing that I’m doing the best I can.
So what is the takeaway? My advice would be to sit down and determine what your main triangle of priorities are, then strive to create that balance. If you’re lucky, the days in which you attain perfect balance and harmony will outnumber the days that are hectic. But if you are doing the best you can, that’s all you can ask of yourself. (And God bless all the parents out there who juggle kids on top of it all!!)